The Splendor of My Loneliness

In my loneliness, I sleep too much.

In my loneliness, I daydream too much.

In my loneliness, I read too much even things that I shouldn’t read.

In my loneliness, million of thoughts rushing through my head.

In my loneliness, I somehow become prayerful.

In my loneliness, I find my splendor.

Seeing myself as a grown-up, I have learned the meaning of INDEPENDENCE for I know I cannot be with my parents/siblings for the rest of my life. I have to find my path to survive. In my thirties, there are times, I want to hide under the wings of my parents; I want my father to forever comfort me with his soothing words; I want my mom to always provide delectable dish on my table. Yet, those are just wishes. . . I have to live on my own. Somehow, I began to see the perks of being lonely.

Fear & Worry

The annoying part of being lonely is to face fears and worries that keep haunting me; I fear thief, rapist, intruder, unknown guest. I worry what will I eat tomorrow, what should I cook, where to buy groceries or many more.

Money Management

Money will never be a problem if people know how to manage it. That’s why I have to be wise in spending. I love the art of shopping; it’s always be awesome, yet it’s also dangerous if I can’t control my shopping habit. Recently, I moved to house that is not fully furnished. I started purchasing primary stuff, such as, bed & bedding, wardrobe, dining table, fridge, and more stuff just to furnish the house. I had to spend some dimes from my saving. Besides, I also have to learn how to pay my bill–electricity, water, etc, Anyway, paying the bill contains loads of excitement. Sounds weird?

Skills of Entertaining

Having a place to stay, I need to establish skills of entertaining guests. When students knock on my door, I should welcome them, at least, providing little delicacy on the table. There are times I need to set a date to invite friends to come to my house;  my mom has trained us (my siblings & I) to let the house open for others, but being aware of strangers should still be my concern.

Be Me-Self

First and foremost, being ‘ME-SELF’ is splendid; it’s indescribable. I have more time to be grateful of my blessings, time to judge my weak-self, time to shed tears, time to ponder about life, and the most important thing time to be more prayerful. I guess this is the stage where I get to know myself better. . . Yes, I guess.

Conclusively, being alone isn’t that scary like what people think; I realized that it brings unique joy into my soul. I am learning to value the splendor of my loneliness.

To dine is to taste

To dine is to taste

Starting New

Starting New

Well, this is just an update of my intriguingly unique life.


2 thoughts on “The Splendor of My Loneliness

  1. yeayyyy!!! save the money to stay in a hotel (when we visit Bandung)…. aseeekkk ada tumpangan…hahahahahhaha…..

    anyway! that’s so true deb…about being independent. a bit scary at first, but then there are excitements afterward. so, when we will have our potluck party at ur palace????? huhuyyyy can’t wait!!!!!

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