Anger in me

Indeed, I was beyond angry. These thoughts were haunting me because I wasn’t listening to my inner voice:

“What? Is that potato chips you’re munching? Don’t consume that!”

“Eat brown rice not white rice! It contains more carbs.”

“Are you eating noodle again? Think of the consequences.”

“No . . . say no to beef burger and fries! No, please!”

“Don’t fry just boil or steam the food.”

“Don’t blame the weather, even it’s cold just go out and run.”

“Stop being lethargic and do your workout routines!”

Why I was so incredibly mad at myself?

I felt like ‘the persistent me’ has gone by the wind. I remember how hard it was to lose just even a kilo. That seven-month journey of losing weight seemed to be in vain because I returned to be ‘old me’, acting as queen bee at home. I don’t know who to blame, is it the weather or the work stress? In the place where I live, rain comes in routine. This place gets so darn cold, a bone-killing weather, I guess. Well you know when the weather is too cold all you want is just cuddling in your bed with warm blanket that your mother gave. Aside from that, I recently have had hard time sleeping before ten p.m. I end up sleeping at midnight and wake up very late. Research claims that if you sleep late at night, your body will gain more weight. Arrg . . .I hate this research! Not just that, I still have the worst part to tell,  my husband and I spend too much eating unhealthy food, where carbs speak more that ‘vegies.’

Since I was so pissed off, I yesterday and today I punished myself by doing the following things:

-cleaned the entire house, mark this: every corner of the house. You know what it means, right?

-washed clothes with hands (well, I put some on the washing machine, though. I couldn’t bear the cold water)

-raked dried leaves, o gosh. . .this was painfully tiring since I have a large yard to clean.

-Cooked brunch for my husband and I yet I begged my husband to wash all the dirty dishes.

-did some workouts: Jumping Jack, Squat (this kills me!), lunges, step-up, push-up (practicing the easiest way, though), triceps dips, High-knee run, wall-sit.

At the end of the day, I collapsed (not literally), too tired to even breathe and roll my eyes. I know this is an unhealthy and unwise way to do. So the bottom line is I should go back to being persistent in exercising (at least three times a week) and consuming healthy food.

I promise! *finger crossed